I have realized one thing today. And I hope this isn’t just one of my whimsies.

For as long as I could remember, I feel empowered wearing earth colors. They make me feel that I belonged to the earth.

I love the beach; I could spend my days sitting in the shore, playing my guitar or swimming in the beach. Watching the sun rise or set, makes me feel so calm.

The mountains, when I used to climb them and stay overnight with the locals, made me want to become someone rich enough to build my own nest up in the hills, where I feel so light yet strong.

For so many years, I had been trying to find my music genre. Growing up, I listen to my father, and my uncles’ cassette tapes. Being hippies at that time, they listen to folk rock. They also had a rich collection of jazz, and some RnB. My family is very much musically-inclined. Dad sings in a band; mom was his biggest fan and perpetual roadie J For maybe 10 years it was their music that I solely immersed myself in, maybe because MTV hasn’t arrived in my hometown back in the 80s.

Then by the time I was 12, I became fascinated with western rock. And for the next 10 or so years, my collection had been a confusing mix of alternative rock, reggae, some metal, some RnB – mostly foreign materials.

I can’t tell how this came to be, me being engrossed more on foreign artists than our local ones. I mean I love Yano, Tribal Fish, and classic heroes like Asin, Joey Ayala, Freddie Aguilar, and APO Hiking Society, to name a few. But it’s just now that I realized that I need to look inside once again.

But, this isn’t about music, anyway.

It’s about my rediscovered fascination of our country. Just this morning I realized that while I’ve been wanting to visit Japan because of its rich, preserved culture, I’ve been missing a lot on what’s in front of me. Do I feel teary-eyed when I read about Japanese history? I have adored foreign musicians and painters, but do I feel my heart squeezing like the way I feel when I visit and see local paintings that depicted life here in the Philippines? Do I cry as much when I listen to “We are the World”, than to Tito Sotto’s “Magkaisa”?

It’s decided. Aside from the many things I do, I will again make an attempt to create yet another fascination. And it is to learn more about my country, the Philippines. Perhaps, I would read again about history, this time with eagerness, not the kind of forced feeling back in the days of when you need to memorize to get good grades. Perhaps, I will allot some budget for travelling around the country, and check out what had been, is, and will be, the contribution of such locality as part of the country. Perhaps, I will listen once again and this time more on underground local bands that have their own distinct ethnic flair. I will also check out local producers of anything consumer goods, and avoid buying imported. Perhaps write more in my own dialect as well on my future entries. The old Shanon is back. Hmmm does this mean this blog’s gonna be about this newfound fascination? Tan-awon nato…

Asin - Usok...

 

asin songs | music videos | lyrics

pay raise - does that affect you?

two months late, finally we are given a raise. but from what seemed like a happy friday morning, the people turned sour-looking just before lunch time. sad to say, i wasn't one of them. no, i didn't get a high raise. i didn't get promoted. i was just not too affected. just because. 

well, okay, i got my reasons. first, because i'm too happy of the idea that i'll be one-loan free (from my several loans) starting march - gosh, i'm so excited that i can start saving! second, i didn't expect a good raise, because if you expect something and you get something else (particularly, less desirable), you'll just end up frustrated and mad - a situation i like to avoid. bad vibes. i don't need them. they eat you alive. and so...yeah, and perhaps, the third reason why i'm cool about this very low  percentage salary increase is because i got a beyond expectation grade - finally - the truth prevailed! and if you wonder why i got a low raise based on a beyond expectation grade? hehe well, i don't care, really. it's up for the company to explain the logic (or the lack of it) in it. ahhaa it's so mind-boggling they deserved to analyze it and explain it to someone critical. the sense of accomplishment alone will make my entire year. call me pathetic for all i care. i'm the biggest loser any employer could ever hire because even for a small amount of money as long as i'm happy with what i'm doing, i'm totally fine. haha! 

well, i got a little secret to stay that way, though. it's not completely contentment, like you probably thought it is. it's by diversifying what i do -  and that means things i do in and outside of work. you see, my day may be consumed mostly by work and the travel hours to get there and home, but... yeah - i'm one of those employees who sneak into the company's T1 line. when i don't have a rush project, i read lots of stuff on wikipedia, and just about everything my little mind flirts at the moment. i also do mini-businesses, where i sell stuff to my colleagues haha i'm such a b**** -  some HR reader might say. But really, it works. I'm not the high-paying kind a worker in this company, and of course, they don't give me high-paying work, so that probably leaves me some time for other things to do - to balance things out eh? what do you think. and yeah, as you can see, i do lots of stuff -  i sew, i draw, i paint faces, on top of being a mom, a wife, a friend, a youtube addict (really? hmmm) ... 

it's a little sad to see my friends vent out their disappointments, frustrations, annoyance in Facebook about how little they got as raise, or as some put it 'tax raise'. but, as i said, bad vibes are not welcome so...

a year's hair routine

wow, it's been a year since i started using natural products on my hair. and i must say, i will stick to this routine for as long as i can. basically, it's just a regular shampoo and conditioner tandem. i seldom use hair masks as i'm a very busy gal. i purchase my stuff from humanheartnature.com, a Filipino company that uses natural ingredients from plants grown in the Philippines. what the moisturizing shampoo and conditioner did to my hair was make it soft, and grow oh so fast. a year ago, my hair was shoulder-length, now they're hanging below the lower chest area. ever since i was a kid, it seemed to take forever to grow my hair. i had dry hair for as long as i could remember. perhaps, i was using the wrong products. now, my split-ends have almost vanished, and i can forget about pony tails (that gave me headache) as i'm proud to wear my hair down. the blackness did come back, too. and the price of these products? amazing! value for money that it sells at more or less the same price with the chemical-laden ones you get at the supermarket. this company's products are all over my house since i think it's now the right time to start acting for the environment. that was my main goal at first - to help not contribute to the waste we are putting on mother earth. but now, it's more than that. :)

grade school diaries

the results of enzo's entrance exam was announced yesterday. and he passed! he was one of the 19 who passed, and i was crying so much of happiness when i heard it from hubby. hubby was the one to check the results at the school since i was manning my one-day bazaar with friend shayne the whole day. i cried like a baby because i've been so wanting enzo to get into that school. reasons? lots. firstly, i was never frustrated every time i visited the school -- the staff members are so professional, the school is so clean and everything looked so in order. second, it advocates multiple intelligence -  something i want my son to be -- a well-balanced person. i don't want him to focus only in the academe - i also want him to be an artist (like mom and dad), and a sporty kid who understands his body more than anybody else. all these, and probably more, i expect from the school, which seems really promising. based on my research, it's a good feeder for the best universities in the country. it is also one of the schools that my ex-colleague recommended; she once was an adviser of a freshman class in one of the well-known all-girl schools in the country. she also mentioned a few schools, but their graduates (grade school) were not as balanced as the ones coming from my son's future school (we're enrolling him in april). she said that most products have very good communicating skills, and are quick in mathematics and well-oriented in sports and arts. the other schools' products were undeniably good communicators, and it's just that. that ex-colleague was one hell of a really good teammate of mine back in the days and i know when she's impressed and when she's just making things up.
despite a ho-hum bazaar (in terms of sales) yesterday, i am happy the entire day. i took a selling space beside a friend i can spend an entire day with. i got the greatest news about my son. i think this is gonna be happy sunday (not to mention that i cleared up my sewing workstation mess, and about to make the dress i designed yesterday at the bazaar)...

some reason why a 25-yr old school never made it big

my son, who is now 5, is currently enrolled in a learning center near our community. he's been going to that school since he was 3, and currently, we are already looking for a bigger school for him come June, when he's in grade 1. i never realized this until i talked with my son about his conversations with one of his teachers. he once told his teacher about our intention to transfer to another school, and oh, how i wanted to write a letter to them to express my disappointment. we were about to take an entrance exam at one candidate school, and it seems my son is upset and he looks like he's been brainwashed.


my son: mommy, my teacher says it's not allowed for kids to transfer to another school.
me (calling from work, a little stressed): of course we need to transfer to a bigger school since you're a big boy now. that school has a soccer field (i need to find some reason to interest him).
my son: no. teacher said it's not allowed. i'm not taking the test.
me: honey, we are not transferring right away. That's in June.

my son: i'm not taking the test. (really upset now, and hang up the phone) 

geez. what in the world are those teachers thinking? are they trying to keep the student count by bullying kids? i bet they do. just tonight, as me and my son are having dinner, he told me he needs to use again that bag the school INSISTS they use. that bag (the third one he had), was just as horrible as the first and second one. the school had some supplier make bags for them at probably a dirt cheap price that the bags don't seem to last two month. i always sort to buying my son a more durable one after two or three months from start of school year. at first, i thought my son is just not careful enough in handling his things, but no. i've talked with several parents, and they experience the same thing - horrible-quality bags --- forced by the school for kids to use --- maybe so that parents keep on buying and buying (at least once every two months, ugh!). and believe me, they're unreasonably priced.

now i know why this school had never become bigger or better after 25 years in the industry. yes, they've been here that long. and most probably, the attitude the staff are showing is dragging them down. TSK.

Yay, two weeks off from reality...

ok, so i finally got the chance to just write away things. it's been almost three months of silence/laziness (to write particularly), and since it's the second day of my two-week christmas vacation, i owe this blog some fresh words.


to start with, i need to explain the silence. two things - busier than ever with rediscovering more important stuff, and reuniting it with the creative side of my life. 


see, i had been reading robert kiyosaki's RDPD, some self-help book i wanted to read for ages but had been discouraged with awful reviews from friends and sites i stumbled upon. but, i eventually did read it. i thought it was enlightening! especially for someone with an entrepreneurial mind! i mean, that book was my reminder. it kind of like reminded me about how i wanted to act, to be, to become since i was selling my hand-made scroongies, pen holders back in grade 2. it reminded me how i wanted to make things and sell them! and i also learned many other real things. so while reading the book, i ventured back into selling. talked with a few partners and sourced fashion stuff to sell during the holiday season. and it's not just selling, it's also putting up your own stall, keeping your merchandise safe while riding in a public transportation, lots of emailing and calling making sure the suppliers provide the items you have promised your clientele, etc. doing the selling thing again was rejuvenating; it feels like i became alive again, after years of just waking up early in the morning to catch the early bus for work. i loved it. but it took most of my weekends away, and i had to sacrifice. it was a good start of something great, i thought.
so, that was the more important part i was talking about earlier. because, i had to grow up. i need to learn how to invest, and not just invest, but to put my money where it could grow. i had to invest, it's the riskiest part of learning, but we only learn when we risk because that's the time we give our all and put our minds into it to survive. and i did learn lots of things. still, despite the nasty reviews of RDPD, it helped me a lot, so my thumb's up to kiyosaki.
on to the less important, i guess, how else should we call it anyway? i went back to my sewing cravings. i think i even made another blog to chronicle my adventures as the "dressmaker", as someone in my loop calls it. but i didn't wanna do real clothes; i chose the more difficult path--make doll clothes, the 1:6 scale kind. everyone says it's suicide to work on those tiny pieces when you're just a novice with the sewing machine. i know, but i persisted. because i love making things, especially tiny ones. the techniques, i had to learn myself because enrolling at a sewing school is worth another sewing machine. i did consider schooling for a time, but i instead bought a sewing machine, and that was a year ago. that was my hubby's advice, and i thought he was right. he is right, because i'm the kind of person who overestimates herself, thinking she can do everything. but isn't that dangerously positive? oh well, but i am really glad i bought that machine instead of signing up for a basic sewing class. so, now zapped to the present, the business woman in me whispered something - why not sell what i'm making? yeah, then i started checking out the market, and i was fascinated by the plethora of doll fashion makers in the internet. they are catering to the collectors market, and isn't it wonderful? i even convinced a fashion accessory designer/entrepreneur friend to make ones for the dolls as well...and i found lots of generous people who provided very helpful tutorials to get me started. i loved sewing for the dolls. it's fun, it's creative that i could do it all day. with it, i could still be the fashion designer i wanted to be since i was a kid; only 5/6 short in scale. 


so eventually, i decided i'm gonna keep doing both activities in the coming years, to keep me sane :) and yeah, of course write some stuff here when i need to. 

90% back to my old skin

as i continued to use philippine lemon (kalamansi) in treating my pimples, my skin is gradually picking up. but i think it's not just that. here are the other lifestyle changes i've made while battling the acne fight:
1. i started drinking lemon water (1 tbsp pure lemon juice + glass of lukewarm water) 
2. i used a papaya soap called Beauche as my facial wash/cleanser.
3. i stopped my daily routine of facial toner and moisturizer, liquid foundation and bronzers/blushes 
4. i used a mineral foundation on a daily basis


There still occasional bumps here and there, but the rest of my skin is back. :)